I fully talk the talk of "The truth only hurts if you have been lying to yourself". I have witnessed a scenario recently where the facts, when told hurt. They hurt a lot. Then when you tell the truth of the facts, it completely changes the under tone of the facts. They almost contradict each other, but neither is wrong, or right for that matter. Neither the facts or the truth are disputable. It seems that the truth should be able to underwrite, or change the scenario around the facts, but this is not always the case. The facts are the action that had taken place and actions speak louder then words. Intent is often vocalized thoughts or statement of desire. When one person looks at only the facts, there can be an extreme amount of unjust dealt. In order for the truth to alter the facts to a positive state, we need to see the truth of the intent before and after the facts that had taken place. Take a scenario of early spring, when there is still snow on the ground, but the children want to wear rubber boots, not snow boots. Mom says, No you still need to wear snow boots. After much arguing, she gives in so the child can learn, it is not time for rubber boots. The intended result is for the child to experience the truth to the desired action. The fact is that they were wearing inappropriate clothing for the weather. Which can be misrepresented if someone wishes to intend harm. There is no disputing the facts, the facts sound harsh and cruel. Tho, that is not the intent. That was an example of a loving intent.
There is another example, is a single mom struggling to make ends meet. The father to the children offers help financially, claiming his interest in the well being of all. The mom knows the unconscious intent of the ex partner is to obtain more control over her, as the ex is an abusive person. It is very likely that the man does not even know his own hidden agenda. Here is where learning the lessons of the past relationship is important. The truth is the mom is trying to keep herself safe from an abusive person by keeping her distance. The facts look like he is trying to help her and she is being difficult.
Do we wonder how so many women end up in desperate situations? Because when presented with the facts, they can be misconstrued to serve whom ever wants to expose the facts the way that they choose. As the facts can not be disputed, and intent has no bearing when exposing the truth of the actions. Tho it is the truth of the intent, that alters the outcome.
I believe that even in the mildest, most innocent of situations, the intent is what ends up driving the outcome in any scenario. Such as the woman who tells her new fiance - I have never stayed with anyone longer then 8 years. Is this stating her unconscious intent even tho he had proposed and she accepted? He asked "Are you going to leave me after 8 years." She may not be thinking she will leave, to her she was stating a fact in her life.
She had stated in the acceptance of the propose the intent of staying with him, for life in marriage. She consciously accepted, but subconsciously,
needless to say, 8 years later........... So the truth was she had a good conscious intention, the facts were she never stayed longer then 8 years. Of course in this scenario she could have changed this pattern had she let the facts of her pattern remain conscious and worked on it.
The intent can be exposed in its truth when the facts are questioned. Same as a man who desires to get to know a woman with no intent of a relationship, but just to see what and how much they can do together. The silent intent; is to leave when there is nothing more that is desired to explore, but the actions state pursuit, until questioned. The facts seem honorable, until the intent is exposed. The intent is hidden until the action of the facts are exposed.
The actions in these examples are to win the trust of the other parties involved. The intent is the reason why they want trust. The truth is what happens in a complete scenario. Another one of my favorite sayings is the there is 3 sides to every story. Each person explains the scenario the way it affected them emotionally, and then there is the facts.